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Care Chapel

Family things

Discuss Family things in the Off Topic Area forum; Family things Sorry to impose on other peoples time, but I would like to get a few things of my chest. About ...


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Old 06-29-06, 07:45 AM   #1 (Link)
 
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Family things


Sorry to impose on other peoples time, but I would like to get a few things of my chest.

About 5 months ago my father died from complications brought about from liver cirrhosis, yep, drinking too much apparently. Now i hear that my mother has about two weeks to live with cancer. They both lived in the UK, and I managed to visit my mother after my father died at the beginnning of March to help her through the difficulties.

I am glad I took the time to go to the UK, but now I cannot take the time to travel back to see her for the last time it worries me about how she will think of me before she dies.

I have three brothers and 2 sisters-in-law that do not seem to have the same connection that my mother and I had, it is sad that they cannot pull together to help her out in her last days. They are all within an hours drive away.

I find it very difficult to talk or write about these things so it is very calming to find a forum that will let you express your self in this way.

God bless you all.


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Old 06-29-06, 11:10 AM   #2 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Steve,

First of all, you ARE NOT impossing at all. This is what the chapel is all about!

I can hear in your words the love you have for your mother...and if I can hear and realize that love...I don't have to imagine or even wonder if you're mother does. She knows, and it is likely the biggest joy for her knowing that her son so desires to be by her side. Your shear desire to be there by her side, makes her so proud to call you her son.

I too lost my mother and frenquently questioned my actions or lack thereof in the final months...but that is evil doubt and fear trying to creep into your mind and heart to steal away the prescious time you have left with your mother. You likely are, but I would suggest talking frequently on the phone and asking her to share her most treasured memories of her as a little girl. Get her to talk about her heritage, your family, etc...so you have your mother's living memories to treasure in your life forever. By simply talking, yes talking...even if you're countries away...will bring comfort to both of you. I have no doubt about that.

I see this as a very special opportunity to bond and give her an opportunity to remember back and share in the wonderful family times, funny stories, and those special moments every family shares!

God's peace and blessing on you and your mother...you're in my prayers!

Erik


The Norwegian A/V Nut

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Old 06-29-06, 01:13 PM   #3 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Hey Steve... as E stated... you are absolutely not imposing.

I believe E has made some really good suggestions... not much I can add to what he has said. The rascal stole my words. It is great to see your love for your mother. I can only imagine the difficulty, but try not to let the evil one discourage you. I will pray for you and her. God bless you both.


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Old 06-29-06, 03:55 PM   #4 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Steve,

I am so sorry to hear about your situation, I understand that you must be going through so much right now.

I am sure that your mother understands, and like Erik has said, I do think that talking to her will help.

Once again, I am sorry to hear about your situation, your mother and family will be in my thoughts and prayers.


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Old 06-29-06, 06:34 PM   #5 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Thanks everyone, I agree with E, the only problem is she is very depressed at the moment and it is like getting blood out of a stone trying to have a conversation, but I will keep trying.

Sorry to hear about the floods you are having over in NY, looks awful.


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Old 06-29-06, 11:35 PM   #6 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Steve,

No imposing or embarassment at all here, it is regretabley something we will face in our journey, forbid our parents outlive us, and I hope the love you have for her will fortify you heart with strength in the weeks ahead. And as always "mother is the name for God on the lips and in the hearts of all children."

~Bob


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Old 08-03-06, 06:31 AM   #7 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Bob, thank you for your kinds words and sorry to hear about the passing of your respected pet. My mother passed away today and as posted by E, I had quite a few moments spent on the phone to her that It does not seem so bad that she has left us. It was more painful when my father died as it was unexpected, my mothers passing was at least expected over the last few weeks.

Thnak you for everyones support, at least both my parents died before any of their siblings.


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Old 08-03-06, 04:59 PM   #8 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Steve... this is great to know you are at peace... or at least at some peace, with your mother passing. I'm sorry to learn of your loss and I will be in prayer for you and all of your family.


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Old 08-03-06, 05:10 PM   #9 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Steve,

As others have stated, I'm sorry to hear about your mother's passing. I'm glad that you have made your peace, and of course, my prayers will be for you and your family.

Regards,
JCD


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Old 08-06-06, 05:16 PM   #10 (Link)
 
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Re: Family things


Steve,

I am very sorry to hear about your loss. My Mom is at a distance these days and is aging. Far from being an imposition, your posts reminds us of the importance of keeping in touch as much as we can.

I can't imagine the difficulty of not being able to get back to see here, but at least you got to have some valuable moments of contact. Sorry again at her passing away, and thanks for posting your experience.

I hadn't gotten around to this area of HTS until today, but I see now that it is an important and valuable aspect of what we are doing and I will pay more attention.


"It is better to debate a question without settling it than to settle a question without debating it."
-Joseph Joubert

Raise the bar.

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