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[img]http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/archive/0/02/20140319151353!The_Amazing_Spiderman_2_poster.jpg[/img]
Releasing Distributor(s): Sony/Columbia Pictures/Marvel
Director: Marc Webb
Starring Cast: Andrew Garfield, Emma Stone, Jamie Foxx, Dane DeHaan, Colm Feore, Felicity Jones, Paul Giamatti, Sally Field, Embeth Davitz, Campbell Scott
Running Time: 142 minutes
Rating: PG-13

HIS GREATEST BATTLE BEGINS.


I don’t even know what to say, fellow ‘Shacksters. Returning from this much-anticipated sequel to the wholly unnecessary reboot of Sony’s comic cash cow last night, I couldn’t help but feel as if I were ”Iron Man 3’ed” all over again…what do I mean by that? I simply could not believe how disappointing Marc Webb’s (sick sense of irony or misguided coincidence?) Amazing Spider-Man 2 was – now, before you go ripping my head off and tossing it down the freshly stained oak lane of a bowling alley in complete opposition to my feelings about the film, please be aware that I know this was loved by many (though I’ve been reading reviews upon reviews by some respected film journalists that I even know personally that can’t believe the hot mess this turned out to be taking into consideration the amount of cash that was poured into its marketing and CGI platforms). I’m merely here to provide my personal thoughts about the film and to review it in the most candid manner I am capable of. The problem, as I see it, begins with two elements: The marketing and the writing. While most critics have been very quick to point a shiny, blood-stained dagger at the throat of director Marc Webb (who really is out of his league with these films; after all, this is the guy who brought us 500 Days of Summer and little, if anything else…the first film of this rebooted franchise was barely tolerable…but this was something different), the blame really needs to be laid at the door of the talentless, charisma-free writing team that is Alex Kurtzman and Roberto Orci, who need to seriously go back to penning ridiculously cheesy dialogue for B-level television shows no one cares to remember. The lines muttered by nearly all characters in this sequel are almost embarrassing to witness, with the main villain Electro (Jamie Foxx) spewing out ”It’s my birthday…time to blow out my candles!" before attacking Times Square in New York with his newfound electrical surges from within his body. Really? This is supposed to be a frightening adversary to face our wall crawling vigilante? Or what about when Paul Giamatti, supposedly playing Russian mob member-turned-villain “Rhino” bellows out in a horrendous, downright stupid Russian accent “I AM DAH RHINOOO!!!” before the final credits roll at the end (and when we’re made to believe there’s going to be a final fight sequence between him and Spidey)? Really? This is what it has come to? People, I realize I am not in the mindless demographic Sony is targeting with these new Spider-Man films, but come on…can people really expect us to believe Sam Raimi’s previous original trilogy was so horrendously awful compared to this ? Everything that made Raimi’s original film so charming – the buildup of characters, the somewhat slow transformation of Norman Osborn into the Green Goblin, et al – is completely and utterly what is wrong with Amazing Spider-Man 2, to say nothing of the fact that I still contend Raimi’s Spider-Man 2 is the best comic adaptation to date (I will get to the downright laughable problems with this “new” reimagined Green Goblin from this film in a bit).

I am going to retouch on all these elements going forward, but let me get to the marketing issues I mentioned – being that Sony’s original vision for this reboot was for it to have a bit of a darker tone in the vain of DC’s Chris Nolan Batman reimagining, and that director Webb and producers Avi Arad, Stan Lee et al wanted to pull this away from Raimi’s original vision for the material, did they actually need to call this Amazing Spider-Man 2? This is a parallel of Raimi’s Spider-Man 2 and it didn’t rub me the right way being that this marketing team was looking to separate itself from Raimi’s trilogy – perhaps even with the hopes that current audiences wouldn’t even remember his films existed (in an interview with some of the producers on the previous Amazing Spider-Man Blu-ray, it is clearly stated that there were many people who weren’t even born when Tobey Maguire was playing Peter Parker and they needed to connect to the audiences who didn’t even know about those Spider-Man stories…can you believe that?). At any rate, where DC/Time Warner got things a bit right by giving the Batman and Superman reboots dynamically different names for a new generation (i.e. Man of Steel, The Dark Knight) we get the same old Amazing Spider-Man 2.

Okay, that’s not this film’s biggest problem. We have another situation wherein the myriad of trailers explosively marketing this sequel depict and tease at sequences that never show up in the actual film – do you remember in one of the trailers when you hear that mysterious cloaked figure we see at the end of Amazing Spider-Man say ”We have plans for you, Peter Parker…”? Or when we see Harry say to Peter in what appears to be an Oscorp hologram-inspired conference room ”My father has been watching you more than he watches me…” and Peter says ”Why?” and Harry answers back ”Isn’t that the question of the day…”? None of these pieces of dialogue are in the final film. And this is merely scratching the surface of what went wrong here.

The trailers promised ultra-kinetic (no pun intended) fight sequences between the adversary known as Electro (a good move by Webb and his team to introduce a Spidey villain never explored by Raimi, such as what was done with the Lizard in the first film) and our wall crawler through the streets of New York, along with some, what appeared to be, vicious hand-to-hand battles with Harry, the re-imagined Green Goblin, on his glider and under the influence of the Oscorp “stuff” that enhances strength and agility but also makes people go cuckoo. What we got, instead, were utterly disappointing fight sequences especially when it came to Green Goblin, who isn’t given nearly enough time to develop and who felt shoehorned in to the end of the film just so Webb could introduce three villains at the same time (you would think filmmakers working with the Spider-Man material would learn from this mistake Raimi made in Spider-Man 3). The villains are a problem all their own; Jamie Foxx's Electro, while looking promising in the trailers and pre-marketing visuals, was an absolute joke prior to the character getting his “electrical prowess” that turns him mad with rage. Every review you will read of Amazing Spider-Man 2 tells of the same parallel between Jamie Foxx’s Max Dillon character and Jim Carrey’s Riddler in Batman Forever in that they both portray the same overly obsessed, offbeat loner working for a big corporation and feeling pushed aside by others, leading to a passion for getting rid of the hero that is taking all the attention (in this case, Spider-Man; in the case of Schumacher’s film, Batman/Bruce Wayne). Foxx’s performance is laughable at best, but, again, he was working with the worthless script he was given by the writers here…still, it does seem like every filmmaker is throwing Foxx in their projects “just because” for whatever reason; I will hold to the fact that he is better suited for doing off-the-wall comedy like Booty Call than mainstream films, especially when he plays the President of the United States (i.e. White House Down)…give me a break.

Then we have the absolutely downright ridiculous joke of an entry that is Paul Giamatti and his “Aleksei Sytsevich” Russian mob character who ends up becoming “The Rhino” but who is given approximately two minutes of screen time in the final scene of the film before the end credits roll in which to “play” this villain. Really, really stupid. As I understand it, Rhino was not a villain in a mechanized suit running rampant in the streets of New York but rather an actual man who becomes a half rhino animal/half human and who is grotesquely massive in size. Webb’s decision to reimagine this villain by stuffing a bald, tattoo-headed Paul Giamatti into a metallic machine shaped like a rhino – I am not kidding – stirred up much controversy amongst fans of the comics, and when you see the final product (if you haven’t already) you’ll understand why. To begin with, Giamatti is given approximately four or so lines of dialogue here, most of which don’t go beyond babbling incoherently in Russian while attempting humorous one-liners in the vain of Mr. Freeze in Batman & Robin. Things go really south when Spidey, in an early skirmish with the Russian criminal, ties him up in webbing and Giamatti babbles something about ”I GET YOUUU SPIDERRR!!! I GET YOU!!!!” What?! This was supposed to be entertaining? But perhaps even more bothersome was the fact that Marc Webb, like Shane Black did so cruelly to fans with the atrocious Iron Man 3, pulled the wool over the public’s unsuspecting eyes when trailers promised a showdown between Spidey and all three villains introduced – including the skirmish we witness in which our web slinger prepares to smash Rhino with a manhole cover -- but what ultimately ends up happening is the film cuts short just before a fight sequence ensues between him and the mechanically enhanced Rhino. A cheap shot and something that had me asking for my money back.


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That brings us to the film’s third and perhaps most controversial element – the reimagining of Harry Osborn, Norman Osborn and the whole Green Goblin/Oscorp debacle. Wow, was this a giant hot mess as handed by Webb. Where do I start? First of all, no one is going to tell me that Sam Raimi’s original film wasn't a great, effective showcase for portraying the eventual transformation of Norman into the mad, raging lunatic dubbed Green Goblin – sure, it was campy and felt silly in some places, but isn’t that what a comic film is supposed to be? Look, what I’m saying is that Raimi’s film had a great pacing and feel that made it seem as though we were fully immersed in the world of Spider-Man, indeed seeming campy at times but coming out all the better for it. Willem Dafoe as Norman was spot-on, in my opinion, and I truly bought it when he went crazy and slipped on the Goblin suit and hopped on the glider…that was a comic adversary. Where is the Goblin’s mask and infamous helmet in this version? It is argued by many that the origin story for this material actually has its roots in explaining how Harry becomes the Goblin – not his father; in Raimi’s version, we see Norman succumbing to the effects of the strength enhancers developed by his company, turning him into a murderous madman, exacting revenge on those who kicked him off the board of directors and ultimately facing his counterpart, Spider-Man. Later, by Raimi’s third film, Norman is of course gone, killed by Spidey in a final skirmish of the first film, and Harry dons the “New Goblin” gear to become some kind of “Goblin surfer” looking to kill his father’s murderer. Of course, we all know this was ridiculous and over-the-top, and most fans hated Spider-Man 3 because of the ridiculousness of the whole “surfing Goblin” thing….and it was stupid. But the fact remains that there is a question of which director was following the original material more closely, or if Webb was working off of current, extremely reimagined Spider-Man comic elements.

So instead of Norman (played here briefly by Chris Cooper) becoming the Goblin, we get the pasty-faced, nauseatingly annoying Dane DeHaan playing his son and becoming Spidey’s tough adversary – but beyond the casting problems with DeHaan, for such a villain who was often considered by fans Spidey’s toughest enemy and who appeared in much of the book’s run, there was a brief fight sequence in Amazing Spider-Man 2 that gave the whole Goblin notion no room to develop, no backstory basis, no chemistry, nothing…it seems all of a sudden Harry teams up with Max Dillon (Electro) to break into Oscorp’s Special Projects vault so he can gain access to the serum Peter’s father was developing because of his rapidly decaying health problems (seems Norman had the same genes and passed it on to his son). In so doing, of course, Harry goes mad and physically transforms into some villainous quasi-beast who hops on to a glider that just happens to be sitting there in development within Oscorp’s Special Projects wing and goes to attack Peter immediately. The whole thing felt rushed, undeveloped and wasted for such an important character in the comic’s world. Adding fuel to this fire is the utterly talentless and painful-to-watch Dean DeHaan, who sleepwalks through his role as Harry Osborn and comes off looking like a young Adolf Hitler sans the mustache. We’re also supposed to believe Harry was off at boarding school and suddenly reconnects with his “best friend” Peter once arriving back in New York; where Raimi explored the relationship between Harry and Peter thoroughly throughout his trilogy (and rightfully so because it was a major component of the comics) the whole notion is lost in Webb’s vision here, probably to cater to the dumb, attention span-lacking demographic that floods theaters now. The dialogue between Andrew Garfield and DeHaan is almost painful to bear witness to and, again, I suspect this was to cater to the young crowds this film targets (slightly post-high school) that would simply “get this” kind of awkward, stupid and downright odd conversation style.

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The least of the issues here was the gorgeous Emma Stone reprising her role as Gwen Stacy, Peter’s continued love interest (even after her father, played by Denis Leary in Webb’s previous film, made Pete promise to keep his daughter away from Spider-Man and the enemies he was going to make) even though the romance between these two gets sickening at times, even with much of the awkwardness from the first film gone. Many critics continue to praise the “chemistry” between Stone and Garfield – I don’t see it and in my opinion the relationship is sleep-inducing. Further, I am still one of those fans that have a problem with the casting of Garfield in the main role. Man, I still don’t buy him as Peter Parker, even under the mask – to me, no one will play it like Maguire, and, unbelievably, I am very much alone in this opinion. Almost everyone you talk to says Garfield nailed this performance, so much better, in fact, than Maguire, who is often considered the “joke” between the two when comparing them. I don’t get it. I cannot stand Garfield, with his random, twitchy, offbeat mannerisms and bizarre out-of-nowhere commentary that really made me cringe in the first film. About the only thing that saves him here is a new suit – indeed, Spidey’s costume for this sequel gets an injection of Maguire-like influences, and, in fact, I kept saying to my wife in the theater that the suit looked exactly like Maguire’s in Raimi’s trilogy. Gone is the awkward, offputting spandex-like texture from Peter’s first attempt at making the suit in the previous film; here, he’s sporting a more cellular-esque outfit that indeed looked very much like the suit from the other franchise.

Webb’s Amazing Spider-Man 2 differs, in analyzing the plot of this disappointment now, from the first film right off the bat with the very opening sequence, as there is no repeating of Sony’s ”Amazing Spider-Man” titles on the screen, preceded by “Columbia Pictures Presents”…instead, we get the currently popular trend in Hollywood to go right into the opening sequence without title introductions, saving that for after end credits begin to roll. Once more, Webb delves into the Dr. Parker (Peter’s father, played by Scott Campbell) backstory in the opening sequence but continues to make a mystery out of the whole “coverup” thing with him and Oscorp – we see Richard Parker and his wife Mary (Embeth Davidtz) on a private Oscorp jet after the events of the first film’s opening sequence when the couple leave young Peter with Aunt May and Uncle Ben (Sally Field and Martin Sheen). Why Webb couldn’t include this in the first film as a proper, complete backstory I will never know, but again – the issue most likely resides with the screenwriters, who Sony needs to fire immediately. We witness Dr. Parker attempting to upload a secret file on his laptop, only to be confronted by the co-pilot of the private Oscorp jet who has just murdered the pilot and who has orders to stop Dr. Parker from sharing his secrets about this company at all costs. Thus begins the “Dr. Parker and his wife were killed in a plane accident” chunk of the Spider-Man story, hinted at in the newspaper headlines in the first film.

Back in New York, Peter is supposed to be attending graduation from Midtown Science High School but finds himself duking it out with a gang of Russian mob mercenaries lead by Aleksei (Paul Giamatti, sporting a ridiculously fake Russian accent and barbed wire tattoo around the ring of his bald head) who have stolen…I don’t know, something. The sequence is ridiculous and cheesy, coming down to Peter actually answering a cell phone call from Gwen while he’s stuck to the grill of a Mack truck during the skirmish with the criminals. As Pete gets Giamatti’s character strung up in a web so authorities can catch him, the Russian criminal mumbles something about ”I GEEET YOU, SPIDERRR!!!” It was utterly embarrassing and some of the cheesiest dialogue I’ve ever heard. Meanwhile, Webb continues to hit us over the head with new characters to introduce, including Max Dillon (Foxx), an electrical engineer working for Oscorp and sporting some pretty fake looking thin hair applications to give Foxx a nerdy appearance; the whole thing was, again, cheesy and overdone, drawing comparisons to what Jim Carrey looked and acted like in Batman Forever. When Max’s blueprints he’s carrying one day as he’s walking down a Manhattan street begin to blow away, he gets his first run-in with Spider-Man and becomes immediately infatuated with him, filling his apartment with pictures and headline clippings and babbling to himself about how he’d like to meet the wall crawler…or something. To be honest, these scenes with Foxx were stupid too, leading to the eventual transformation of his character into “Electro” (a named he gave himself) after he is seemingly shocked with current in a maintenance tunnel of some kind at Oscorp, throwing him down into a water-filled tube loaded with genetically-enhanced eels of some kind (honestly, I had no idea what the “eels” or whatever they were had to do with anything relating to Electro).

Max’s body is taken by Oscorp after his accident as to cover the incident up from press coverage and the like, but the engineer soon awakens to discover he’s been horrifically transformed into a walking surge of energy; a creature than can not only fly around at will but can zap bolts of electricity at anything and anybody. He begins stumbling about on the streets of New York, eventually coming into a confrontation with police before Spidey gets his “tingling” sense telling him something is up and arrives in Times Square to face off with this new villain. Of course, our hero learns this gleaming blue body of energy was once Max Dillon, the man he saved in the streets not too long ago…but because of personal rage, horrible insecurities and jealously over Spider-Man getting all of New York’s attention, Max decides to use his newfound powers to destroy and fight the wall crawler. The first fight sequence between the two turns the film in a positive direction after all the nonsense that came before it, but Webb utilizes a filming style a bit controversial to fans and critics, breaking the battle scene between Electro and Spidey into start-and-top slow motion shots to emphasize the power of Max’s energy weapons and Spidey’s own strength and web shooters.

The film continues to prod on at this point concentrating mainly on Foxx’s Max Dillon character, who ends up getting sent to a prison-like criminally insane asylum where, under Oscorp’s orders, he’s tortured and tested by some crazy scientists attempting to figure out exactly what happened to the engineer who once worked for them. At this point, Foxx really begins to ham up the character, posing threats and showing an angered, rage-driven side that the filmmakers should have continued going with for a more serious tone to the story. But no; as Max is strapped to a mechanism of some kind so he can be studied and experimented on within a secret chamber, he spews some threatening dialogue at the scientist studying him, proclaiming ”You wanna know who I am? I’m ELECTRO…” What? The villain gave himself his own nickname? Really? This didn’t make sense to me; normally, as the stories go, the media or public attach pet names to heroes and villains, but this was utterly stupid.

[img]http://lovepirate77.files.wordpress.com/2013/12/image11.jpg[/img]
Finally, we’re introduced to Mr. Harry Osborn, snot-nosed goodie-goodie son of Norman Osborn, who, as is hinted at in the previous film, is dying. Harry (Dane DeHaan, playing the role nowhere near as convincing as James Franco did) goes to see his father (Chris Cooper, who never appears in the film or story again after this scene save for some holographic images at Oscorp) on his deathbed and learns that he too has inherited the “Osborn curse” that is a degenerative genetic condition. Apparently, this “condition” makes you grow eagle talon-like nails and reptilian skin in certain patches but if you thought that is weird, just wait until Harry goes back to New York and takes over his father’s company in the wake of his death. That’s another thing that bothered me about Webb’s film – for such a vital character in the books, Norman isn’t even explored here. The way Raimi introduced him in his first film was brilliant, in my opinion, showing how Norman was running experiments at Oscorp for the government, eventually introducing the glider and performance enhancing serum, and Dafoe played the character to a tee. But here, Norman gets no screen time, no development and no involvement in the Green Goblin manifestation; instead, his son returns to Oscorp in New York and takes command of the board of directors…yes, that’s right, a 20 year-old, ugly-as-sin, pasty-faced brat takes control of a multi-billion-dollar company. But if you can get past that ridiculous notion, the way in which he behaves once he’s in control of the board is even worse, leading to the members getting him thrown off and out of the firm.

At this point, Harry’s symptoms that he “inherited” from his father are beginning to show, and he becomes desperate to get a sample of Spider-Man’s blood after learning, somehow, that the hero was bitten by the spiders created by his father’s company. He turns to Peter for help in tracking him down, based on Peter’s history, of course, taking pictures of the web slinger for the Daily Bugle. At first Peter refuses because he knows what it would mean if Harry injected himself with such blood – but eventually Spider-Man arrives at Harry’s mansion, if only to refuse to help the billionaire kid once again. Now fully succumbing to the effects of his symptoms, Harry makes a deal with the villain known as Electro, learning he was once Max Dillon, an employee of Oscorp, to break him out of the asylum he’s in if he will help him track down Spider-Man. If this smacks of Venom and Sandman’s “coming together” at the end of Spider-Man 3 you’d be spot-on, my friend.

What Webb seems to do is set up a battle between these three supervillains – Electro, Rhino and Green Goblin – and the wall crawler, but in reality what happens is Electro causes a massive power outage across New York via a power grid he zaps and gains more power himself from, leading to a second battle between him and Spidey at the grid’s plant. As this is happening, Harry demands one of the main Oscorp board members (Colm Feore, playing “Donald Menken”) take him to the company’s secret projects level where he injects himself with the serum Peter’s father and Norman Osborn developed. Of course, this causes him to transform into some hideous, fang-toothed, seething “being” that hops on an Oscorp super “glider” and heads on over to the power grid where Spider-Man has, evidently, done away with Electro thanks to help from Gwen. But this whole sequence just doesn’t have time to develop; there’s no experimenting with the glider, no story about Oscorp’s development of it…we just have Harry flying in, suddenly, to attack Peter and Gwen as this enraged “Goblin” that’s really nothing of the sort…it’s just DeHaan with some green eye applications, green upstanding hair that looks like he stuck his finger in an electrical outlet and some green-ish, Linda Blair-from-The Exorcist-like teeth. Where are references to the “Green Goblin” being that Electro gave himself his own name and Paul Giamatti bellowed that “he is the RHINO!”? Harry simply swoops down and engages in a quick fight on his glider with Peter/Spidey, leading to Spidey dispensing with him rather quickly. This makes absolutely no sense, because in the comics the Goblin was Peter’s deadliest and toughest foe. Here, he’s stuffed in at the end in a hack rush job by Webb in order to satisfy people who wanted to see a “reimagining of the Green Goblin.”

There’s also a somewhat controversial sequence that concludes the Spidey/Goblin battle involving Peter’s love interest that I won’t divulge here.

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What’s worse is the sequence just preceding the end credits – we’re lead to believe that Harry actually wasn’t killed by his run-in with the amazing Spider-Man and is now locked up in a criminal asylum, approached by the mysterious cloaked figure that “talks” to Dr. Connors at the end of the first film in his cell (does this remind anyone of the cloaked figure from the later Halloween films that made them suck so badly?) and who seems to be putting together a “team” of adversaries to continue going after Peter per Harry’s request. What we get is a clip of Paul Giamatti’s Russian mob character being “broken” out of prison when he’s delivered a specialized massive mechanical “rhino” suit (apparently created by Oscorp as a prototype, much like the Goblin’s glider and suit) with which he rampages down the street in, eventually coming face-to-face with Spidey himself. But if the idiotic lines muttered by Giamatti in his rhino suit such as ”I AM DEE RHINOOOO!!!” as he tramples towards the wall crawler and he flips and flies away dodging the machine gun bullets from the guns on Giamatti’s suit weren’t bad enough, what Webb does to fans at the very end here sure is. We’re lead to believe a final standoff between Spidey and Rhino is about to transpire, but instead what we get is the wall crawler preparing to smash the armor suit in with a manhole cover, as depicted in the trailers…and that’s it. From there, the screen goes to the end credits and we are left wondering what just happened.

Many people are speculating that this is setting up a “Sinister Six” situation for the next film, which will pit the hero against six dangerous adversaries at once – but I couldn’t help but feel so jaded at the end of Amazing Spider-Man 2, much like how I felt after walking out of Iron Man 3. This was a truly disappointing entry in the franchise, lacking all the charm, charisma and electricity – again, no pun intended – of Raimi’s films, especially the second one where he introduced Otto Octavius who becomes Doctor Octopus. If you watch the fight sequences in Raimi’s Spider-Man 2 carefully, you’ll get the feeling, like I always do, that these jumped right off the pages of the comic book…the blow-by-blow punches they land on each other, the tumbling from New York buildings together as Ock’s mechanical arms swing at Spidey in a lightning-quick fashion as the web slinger dodges them and hits Ock with his webs…the whole thing was brilliant and felt like a comic adaptation. Even comparing Raimi’s original Spider-Man with this one, Willem Dafoe played a much more believable Osborn senior who becomes a much more dangerous, palpable Green Goblin – even the final fight sequence in Raimi’s first film takes Webb’s Amazing Spider-Man 2 to school with awesome punch-for-punch moments between the two rival adversaries and Peter finally regaining the strength to get the upper hand on the super-strong villain after his behind is basically handed to him. We got none of that here; the Goblin was a joke and underdeveloped (and I still don’t like Harry becoming the “first” Goblin as opposed to his father), Jamie Foxx’s Electro was frightening only when he became the ball of mysterious energy and forget about Paul Giamatti and Rhino…I don’t know what Webb and his writers were thinking with that abomination of a villain character that was supposed to be a massive half man, half rhinoceros. And, we still haven’t seen any involvement of Peter’s Bugle editor, Jameson, who is so prevalent in the books, and what about Mary Jane Watson? Is she gonna be Peter’s new love interest in the next one? We see references in this to Peter sending Jameson pictures of Spider-Man for the newspaper via email to get paid as a freelance photographer, but are we to believe Webb isn’t going to introduce this character (played so expertly by J.K. Simmons in Raimi’s trilogy) in the physical form because of the modern day way of doing business (i.e. via a computer or phone)?

You wanna know the truth, friends? I don’t think I’m gonna buy this when it comes out on Blu-ray. I truly hope the next entry makes up for this one, but I doubt it considering Marvel and Sony are probably going to sit Marc Webb and his team of miscreants back in the operational saddle yet again to destroy this unnecessarily rebooted franchise.

Oh, and with all Marvel projects, look for a mid-credits sequence extra scene that hints at the direction the next film may take, though I don’t really see how – let’s just say if you’re a fan of the X-Men, you may understand the logic behind the inclusion in Spidey’s universe better than me.
 

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Sounds like you should have got your money back. I liked Ironman 3, it wasn't great but not horrible for me. Hopefully I can find some value in the new spidey flick and after this review I may wait and buy it used, usually I buy the blockbusters new but this one sounds scary. Thanks for the review O. Any back reviews now that the ratings ban seems to have been lifted?
 

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lol, didn't like it much I see ;)

I had some of the same complaints you did. it was definite step down from "The Amazing Spiderman" (which I found to be near perfection..especially since I consider Raimi's trilogy to be some of the biggest superhero trash along with Catwoman and Barb wire)

Electro's lines were pretty painful. I like him as a villain on paper, but he was poorly executed. the whole "obsession" thing was really bad, and really took away from tone of the movie. plus he was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY overpowered.

Harry and the Goblin suit... they definitely took the "Ultimate Spiderman" route there, so I saw that coming. Dehan was actually my favorite part of the movie, his twisted take on Harry was gold IMO

the Rhino... good grief, while I'd love to see the Rhino and I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE Giamotti it's obvious they're trying too hard for the sinister 6 movie, cramming too many villains in and trying to get all six in by the time the 4th movie is out.

Garfield I still love, he reminds me of the Peter Parker I grew up with in the 80s (I stopped part way through the 90s because they made him less the carefree sarcastic goofball that I loved about his 60's - 80's career), but then again, a talking monkey could have played a better parker than Tobey MaGuire (I feel like punching his whiny face in just about every movie he's ever been in)

and you're right about Emma stone. she gave life to gwen in ways that I didn't see coming... total gem and made the inevitable "Gwen Stacy Scenario" even more heart rending

I'm not going to say it's IM3 to me... only Man of Steel has gotten that one for me recently... but it definitely had it's ups and downs....disappointing, especially how much I adored the first one
 

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Sounds like you should have got your money back. I liked Ironman 3, it wasn't great but not horrible for me. Hopefully I can find some value in the new spidey flick and after this review I may wait and buy it used, usually I buy the blockbusters new but this one sounds scary. Thanks for the review O. Any back reviews now that the ratings ban seems to have been lifted?
it's definitely not perfect. also depends on your point of reference for the first movie. I thought the 1st movie was a 4.5/5 movie, so it's around a 3.5 for this one. Osage was more 3/5 for the first one if I remember correctly so we both think it dropped a fair amount from the first one, just depends on how much you liked the first one really. if you liked the first one a good bit you should at least enjoy this one, but recognize it's flaws (some of them severe), but if you weren't a fan of the first one to begin with than you'll not be too happy ..

it's not a DRASTIC drop in quality from the ASM, so it really will depend on how much you liked the first one
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Multiple nicks and tucks made to review, with, more than likely, more to come; thank you.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Sounds like you should have got your money back. I liked Ironman 3, it wasn't great but not horrible for me. Hopefully I can find some value in the new spidey flick and after this review I may wait and buy it used, usually I buy the blockbusters new but this one sounds scary. Thanks for the review O. Any back reviews now that the ratings ban seems to have been lifted?
Oh good grief....you liked Iron Man 3...even after we were fooled into thinking we were actually gonna see Mandarin and didn't? :rolleyesno::rolleyesno::rolleyesno:

Thanks for reading the review though; as for the ratings ban, I wasn't even made aware of it...:huh:
 

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Discussion Starter · #7 ·
lol, didn't like it much I see ;)

I had some of the same complaints you did. it was definite step down from "The Amazing Spiderman" (which I found to be near perfection..especially since I consider Raimi's trilogy to be some of the biggest superhero trash along with Catwoman and Barb wire)
Oh, one of those eh? :foottap:

Good grief...you thought Raimi's trilogy was WORSE than this mess (the first of Webb's films)? I must wholeheartedly disagree with you there Mike...I thought Maguire had the gestures down (was he utterly annoying? YES. But what high school kid isn't? And Peter WAS awkward in the books -- but nothing like Garfield's bizarre body language...jeez...) and I will continue to hold to the fact that the fight sequences were FAR superior in the first two Raimi films, especially the second, than anything in the Webb variants. The Lizard was definitely cool...but he was NOT Doc Ock in the second Raimi picture.

Electro's lines were pretty painful. I like him as a villain on paper, but he was poorly executed. the whole "obsession" thing was really bad, and really took away from tone of the movie. plus he was WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY overpowered.
Agreed, and don't forget the parallel to Jim Carrey in Batman Forever...

Harry and the Goblin suit... they definitely took the "Ultimate Spiderman" route there, so I saw that coming. Dehan was actually my favorite part of the movie, his twisted take on Harry was gold IMO
UGHHHHHHH....I am out of the loop here apparently. I was not aware, however, that they dipped into "Ultimate Spider-Man" for this vision, so in all fairness perhaps that was a genuine basis...but I still thought it wasn't developed NEARLY enough.

the Rhino... good grief, while I'd love to see the Rhino and I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE Giamotti it's obvious they're trying too hard for the sinister 6 movie, cramming too many villains in and trying to get all six in by the time the 4th movie is out.
That's what I had mentioned; but for the love of mankind, what was Webb thinking with this character? "I AM DAH RHINOOOO!!"

Really? :coocoo:

Garfield I still love, he reminds me of the Peter Parker I grew up with in the 80s (I stopped part way through the 90s because they made him less the carefree sarcastic goofball that I loved about his 60's - 80's career), but then again, a talking monkey could have played a better parker than Tobey MaGuire (I feel like punching his whiny face in just about every movie he's ever been in)
That's it -- we're officially not friends anymore! :paddle:

and you're right about Emma stone. she gave life to gwen in ways that I didn't see coming... total gem and made the inevitable "Gwen Stacy Scenario" even more heart rending
Well, I just think Stone is...hot....:T

I'm not going to say it's IM3 to me... only Man of Steel has gotten that one for me recently... but it definitely had it's ups and downs....disappointing, especially how much I adored the first one
Oh boy are we on different pages...I liked Man of Steel (just watched that again last night ironically) MUCH better than Iron Man 3 or this...the fight sequences between Zod and Supes alone were worth the price of admission....did I like it better than Superman II? No way; no one will play the role of Zod better than Terence Stamp...but Man of Steel was sure better than Iron Man 3...:rolleyesno:
 

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lol, yeah we have a slightly different view on the spidey universe (which is cool, gives us different perspectives on the flaws and good points of movies...especially considering that there's MULTIPLE takes of spidey on film now)... I loathe the Raimi trilogy as a whole... #2 is at least watchable, but the rest I can't even watch anymore. lets say there's a reason why spidey 3 is on the top 5 worst comic book movies of all times lists from Forbes and a myriad of other places ;)


the Rhino I still think was the worst part of the film, but that's partially because of the ultimate universe... and yes, the Ultimate Universe was where Webb and crew pulled all their characters and ideas from. it's why we have a black electro instead of the green and yellow tights, the mecha "Rhino" as well as Harry being the Goblin first etc.... all of this was taken from the Ultimate universe. also explains the "emo" parker

and I take it back... man of steel made me angry, but nowhere as bad as IM3....the one that had me slobbering at the mouth I was so furious over was "The Lone Ranger...... that was the one my brain was thinking of when I was thinking of my Iron man 3 competitor for worst movie I'd seen in the theater
 

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Discussion Starter · #9 ·
lol, yeah we have a slightly different view on the spidey universe... I loathe the Raimi trilogy as a whole... #2 is at least watchable, but the rest I can't even watch anymore. lets say there's a reason why spidey 3 is on the top 5 worst comic book movies of all times lists from Forbes and a myriad of other places ;)
Oh, the third Raimi film was definitely a quasi-disaster; even Raimi admits they were beginning to lose control of the plot structures at that point and that too much was happening to wrap the trilogy up too fast. Though There were some cool moments between Spidey and Sandman and even when he's duking it out with Topher Grace's awful rendition of "Venom" at the end. But the whole "Harry is a surfing Goblin" thing? Whatever...

Still, to me, Raimi's "Spider-Man 2" is still the definitive comic adaptation, even taking into consideration "Avengers"...it takes some of the greatest moments of the pre-"Ultimate Spider-Man" books and brings them to life, especially the fight sequences with Doc Ock...


the Rhino I still think was the worst part of the film, but that's partially because of the ultimate universe... and yes, the Ultimate Universe was where Webb and crew pulled all their characters and ideas from. it's why we have a black electro instead of the green and yellow tights, the mecha "Rhino" as well as Harry being the Goblin first etc.... all of this was taken from the Ultimate universe.
Indeed; I will have to do some research on the books...

and I take it back... man of steel made me angry, but nowhere as bad as IM3....the one that had me slobbering at the mouth I was so furious over was "The Lone Ranger...... that was the one my brain was thinking of when I was thinking of my Iron man 3 competitor for worst movie I'd seen in the theater
:rofl::rofl:
 

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Oh good grief....you liked Iron Man 3...even after we were fooled into thinking we were actually gonna see Mandarin and didn't? :rolleyesno::rolleyesno::rolleyesno: Thanks for reading the review though; as for the ratings ban, I wasn't even made aware of it...:huh:
At least I haven't watched Erased yet!
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
At least I haven't watched Erased yet!
Are you just messin' with me at this point? How do you even REMEMBER the name of that title?
 

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Thanks for another fine review. I didn't see this movie and after reading your review. I will skip this one. Personally I don't like to see "reboots". To me hardly anything beats the original.
 

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Oh, the third Raimi film was definitely a quasi-disaster; even Raimi admits they were beginning to lose control of the plot structures at that point and that too much was happening to wrap the trilogy up too fast. Though There were some cool moments between Spidey and Sandman and even when he's duking it out with Topher Grace's awful rendition of "Venom" at the end. But the whole "Harry is a surfing Goblin" thing? Whatever...

Still, to me, Raimi's "Spider-Man 2" is still the definitive comic adaptation, even taking into consideration "Avengers"...it takes some of the greatest moments of the pre-"Ultimate Spider-Man" books and brings them to life, especially the fight sequences with Doc Ock...




Indeed; I will have to do some research on the books...



:rofl::rofl:

ROTFL!!!! surfing Goblin... I'm going to have to remember that..... and yeah, the Venom thing was a disaster thanks to Sony wanting to shoe horn him in. it doesn't help that I'm a complete and total Venom nut... favorite anti-hero character EVER, even above Frank Castle for me. I read every issue ever with him, even his own spin off series, so when they cast that 70's drug addict as Eddie Brock I nearly fell over.

And yeah, Raimi's trilogy took a few hints from the Ultimate series, but mostly stuck with the Amazing and Fantastic series origins.



ooooooooooooooh, TOTALLY not kidding about the lone ranger. my wife had to shush me in the theater and told me no less than 3 times that "I was embarrassing her" with all my muttering :D
 

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Discussion Starter · #15 ·
Thanks for another fine review. I didn't see this movie and after reading your review. I will skip this one. Personally I don't like to see "reboots". To me hardly anything beats the original.
Thanks Joe; did you see the first "Amazing Spider-Man"?

Sometimes, as Mike pointed out, it's not a bad thing to get another filmmaking team's take on perhaps "different" material that came from some of the comics...but stuff like "Iron Man 3" was...well...a disaster. In my opinion, this comes close...but you have to take into consideration it was sourced from a variant of the Spider-Man mythos that is not readily known...
 

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Discussion Starter · #16 ·
ROTFL!!!! surfing Goblin... I'm going to have to remember that
LOL...that's what everyone was calling the take on that ridiculous character when it came out...cause it kinda looked like a surfboard thing he made to go after Pete in the beginning...

..... and yeah, the Venom thing was a disaster thanks to Sony wanting to shoe horn him in. it doesn't help that I'm a complete and total Venom nut... favorite anti-hero character EVER, even above Frank Castle for me. I read every issue ever with him, even his own spin off series, so when they cast that 70's drug addict as Eddie Brock I nearly fell over.
Indeed?

ooooooooooooooh, TOTALLY not kidding about the lone ranger. my wife had to shush me in the theater and told me no less than 3 times that "I was embarrassing her" with all my muttering :D
:rofl::rofl::rofl:

I heard Lone Ranger was pretty awful...BIG bomb for Disney...I didn't subject myself to it.
 

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LOL...that's what everyone was calling the take on that ridiculous character when it came out...cause it kinda looked like a surfboard thing he made to go after Pete in the beginning...



Indeed?



:rofl::rofl::rofl:

I heard Lone Ranger was pretty awful...BIG bomb for Disney...I didn't subject myself to it.
trust me, you didn't miss much


and for the NEXT big bomb... the new Fantastic 4 movie looks like it's heading to be the next major dive bomb for them ....just reading about it is horrifying me
 

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Discussion Starter · #18 ·
trust me, you didn't miss much


and for the NEXT big bomb... the new Fantastic 4 movie looks like it's heading to be the next major dive bomb for them ....just reading about it is horrifying me
I TOTALLY read about the Fantastic 4 reboot myself...yeah, casting a BLACK Johnny Storm and a WHITE Susan Storm...when they're BROTHER and SISTER? Okay...

Some are explaining it off by saying well, they could have come from a mixed marriage....which is true, but come on...they're really stretching and groping here, aren't they?

And was this a franchise that needed to be rebooted, really? Though campy and downright dumb in places, the first two films were fine IMO -- showing how they got their powers in the first one and then facing the Silver Surfer in the sequel...and, "Rise of the Silver Surfer" had some of the coolest CGI work on a comic film, especially the sequences involving the title character...:T
 

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Are you just messin' with me at this point? How do you even REMEMBER the name of that title?
Our back stock of movies us getting out of hand. Between resetting the center channel( finally) and adding some Marantz mono blocks we seem to have a subwoofer issue.(time to call Sonnie?) We watched a lot of netflix as of late Breaking Bad,Walking Dead, American Horror Story and 24 to refresh for the new season on the only channel we get, wow I'm cheap ;).
 
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